Tuesday, August 26, 2008

This is a joke, right?

File this under the category of "Never get complacent whilst undergoing IVF." I've mentioned before that in vitro is a vengeful beast. First IVF, you produce a great lining, pump out some decent embryos to transfer and a few to freeze, make it to beta and zippo...hello negative. Ok. First FET, you pump yourself full of lupron, dine on estrogen tabs, schlump along to transfer then...blammo, your lining sucks in like it's Oscar night and a size 0 Carolina Herrara. Cancelled. First FET times 2, you again pump yourself full of lupron and estrogen tabs, throw in some shots of estrogen to the tail and make it to transfer with 2 high quality blasts. You expect, based on your experience, a negative OR a positive. Turns out you should have chosen "c", all of the above, for a positive, followed by a negative. Alrighty.

So you start fresh. Your experience tells you that you'll likely get a decent number of follicles like last time, might have some lining issues, but the shots in the tail should take care of it like last time. You'll make it to transfer and this time, you'll get either a negative, a positive followed by a negative, or a real positive. Silly girl. Why should you put any faith in past experiences? The vengeful beast has other plans.

Last week, I was thiiisss close to being canceled because my follicles were slow to develop. My lining though had never been better. This week, turns out my lining thinks it should be wearing Valentino and my follicles are on the move. Eeehh? So, I'll make it to retrieval but not to transfer if my lining doesn't GAIN BACK THE TWO MM IT LOST OVER THE @#$%^&*! WEEKEND.

How can this be? How can this BE, I ask you? I was with my lining all weekend. There were no black tie events. No one, I assure you, was on a diet. No one was traumatized to the point of losing weight. How does this happen?

No "I'm sorries." I need answers. If no answers, then please help me find the appropriate person or thing to blame for this.

8 comments:

Io said...

What the fuck man. Isn't there some sort of military school you can ship the repro organs off to to get them marching in time together?

Raftpoop.

Denise said...

The voice of my nurse is ringing in my ears "a lining doesn't just shrink without a bleed." Blame it on the tech who measured your lining either before or after the alleged shrinkage. Something sounds fishy here.

Shinejil said...

I smell a rat! I blame the tech, like Denise suggests.

PJ said...

I'll give it to ya, that does royally suck!

However, it's all about perspective. I can't seem get my follies on the damn bandwagon. After two cancellations, If I made it retrieval, I'd be thrilled!

Denise's comment does make a lot of sense though. I bet that's it.

Hope things look up!

Rebeccah said...

My acupuncturist once told me that the process of stimulating the ovaries actually makes the uterus a less hospitable place rather than the nice lush spa environment we want it to be. My RE, on the other hand, to whom I was paying the big bucks to train my ovaries AND my uterus, told me the very opposite. Someone was lying, but who?! Bastards...

Evil Stepmonster said...

I find that the endometrium is a finicky lass prone to surliness and hissy fits. Are you sure you didn't say or do anything to offend her?

But I'm with the others, blame the tech.

Duck2 said...

sorry to hear of the nasty nasty ivf hell hitting you hard again... hmmm. My RE did all my measurements and in the same scan he could make it largish (which is around a 4 for me) to small a 2.... all depends on the scan.
I'll miss you too, cheering for you, and when I feel like I can do this world again I will stop by (maybe 6 months from now when hoping you will be one of those pregnant blogs).

Deb said...

I will offer no 'sorries', but will tell you to go ahead and blame me...my mom always does (lol) so you can too.