The first day of my last period was September 21, 2008. Sunday. Today is October 27, 2008. I have had no period since September 21, 2008, which was one week after my last failed IVF. That's 37 days. I'm not pregnant because the peestick I christened on Friday says, most emphatically, I'm not pregnant. I have been instructed to take my last birth control pill on November 18 in preparation for my third and final IVF. One can't begin taking birth control pills until one's period arrives. I have felt crampy and headachey and blah-y for the last two weeks. No period. I wore white pants after labor day yesterday. No period. Seriously, what the hell?
1. My body is on strike. Holding out for more favorable treatment and higher pay. No negotiations. No crossing the picket lines. I start eating my vegetables, exercising regularly and getting regular spa treatments, body returns to work. Normal bodily functions ensue. Body to Melanie: You're not the boss of me, scab. Melanie to Body: Uh, no shit.
2. Body and Mind are in collusion. Mind tells Body that shots are right around the corner. Mind reminds Body of physical effects of shots. Body points out that Body only recently healed from last round of punctures. Body reminds Mind how crazy Mind gets when shots ensue. Mind grows angry. Body follows suit. Body and Mind become co-conspirators. Melanie screwed.
3. The mighty infertility forces ("MIF") realize that lack of a period was never a factor Melanie factored in. With unbridled glee, the MIF punish her for making plans in advance and otherwise attempting to assert control over the MIF. Once sufficient angst and wringing of hands has occurred, MIF will allow the red surge. Cue evil laughter.
4. See previous post. Bitch slap from fate.
Tomorrow I visit the RE. More then.