Thursday, January 22, 2009

The fickle hand of fate...

My little B twin didn't make it. I feel such disappointment and at the same time such joy that A is thriving. The two emotions kind of cancel one another out, huh? How strange to go from really wanting only one child, to becoming so invested and, well, in love with the idea of two. No limits to our hearts, I guess?

A is still measuring one day ahead and continues to twitter about in its little sac. Kind of reminds me of those seahorses you could order from the back of Archie comics. 2.16 centimeters. I'm hoping for hearty stock with that one.

25 comments:

bb and mtb said...

So sorry to read about Baby B and my hopes are with you and Baby A.

Mrs.X said...

Oh, so sorry about the little B. It is a strange feeling to be happy and sad at the same time. I hope that A continues to be quite the little fighter!

Jewels said...

I'm so sorry about B baby.
Thoughts and Prayers for A baby to continue to thrive.

Mermaid said...

I'm so very sorry. I know how your love for one becomes the smae love for two in an instance. I hope Baby A continues to thrive.

Lara said...

REally sorry to hear about Baby B, but delighted to hear Baby A is kickin' butt! Hold on tight!

Amy said...

So sorry to hear about Baby B. I found your blog through Denise.

Thoughts and prayers going out to you!

Denise said...

I can't even imagine how you feel. I think a part of me always expected one of ours not to make it through most of the pregnancy. Self preservation I guess. I hope Baby A continues to thrive and that you continue to find joy in that.

Rebeccah said...

Oh Melanie ... so very sorry about little B. Such a bittersweet time for you. Our hearts do expand to take in what life gives us, but then we're opened to grief in equal proportions ... Wishing little A lots of hardiness!

Rachel said...

Long time lurker. I'm really sorry to hear about Baby B. Although I know we all go into this just wanting a healthy take-home baby, I still can't imagine how I'd cope with all of those extra hopes for twins and then disappointment. I hope you allow yourself to mourn the change in dreams, if that helps.

Mo and Will said...

My mouth dropped open when I read your news. I am so so sorry. Of course you were attached to the idea of two already. Hoping Baby A continues to go strong.

Hang in there. Take time to grieve and take good care of yourself.

Almamay said...

Melanie, I'm so sorry. Keep strong for Twin A

loribeth said...

I'm sorry, Melanie! I hope Baby A continues to do well.

Duck said...

Sorry about baby B - and am glad that A is still with you!

Cassandra said...

Sorry to hear about little B.

Best wishes for A's continued health and growth.

Phoebe said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. I hoping the rest of your pregnancy remains uneventful and healthy. HUGS!!

Tamra said...

Hi:
I also had an A and a B.
My little A (Nolan Ross)turned 2 last Saturday-
our B (Lucas Ross) lived for an hour after birth. We had already bought 2 cribs when we found out from ultrasound his kidneys hadn't developed properly.

I am sorry for your loss. And yes it is wonderful that you will still get a beautiful new baby but don't let anyone tell you that it makes the loss any easier. It doesn't. Allow yourself to grieve.

Elle Charlie said...

Oh, no, I'm so sorry to hear about baby B. But also so relieved to know A is thriving. How bittersweet. I can only imagine how easy it is to fall in love with the idea of two.

Another Julia said...

I am truly sorry--I've been there. We lost one of our IVF/ICSI twins at about 7 weeks, too. The other twin did beautifully, I had an uneventful full--term pregnancy, and my baby B is now five. My RE and OB at the time told me that it was VERY unusual for anyone to lose both at that stage, which was very reassuring to me.
So sad to hear about your little Baby B. May the rest of your pregnancy be totally perfect.

Shinejil said...

I'm sorry about B. That happy-sad combo seems to haunt us denizens of IF land.

I'm cheering for A's continued success.

To A T said...

I'm so sorry to hear about baby B! :(

Sending P&PTs for baby A!

Paranoid said...

I'm so sorry. I'll keep you and baby A in my thoughts.

dmbonilla said...

Melanie, I just read your blog. Im really sorry about Baby B too. Know that we're all behind you, supporting you and Baby A for a healthy delivery.

Sweet Georgia said...

I'm so sorry about losing Baby B. And, of course, so happy that Baby A is doing well. Thinking good thoughts for you.

Joonie said...

I'm so sorry. I know how you love them from the beginning (even at times before conception), wishing you the very best with baby A.

'Murgdan' said...

I'm so sorry about Baby B...